| | Wha'daya So Mad About? |  |
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+9The_Jaster masofdas Jimbob Balladeer JayMoyles ZeroJones Buskalilly Crumpy Andy Muss 13 posters |
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Muss
Shiny Shuckle
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| Subject: Wha'daya So Mad About?  Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 21:10 | |
| Look, we've all been around video games and the internet long enough to realise that the comments section on any article or review is an abhorrent mess. Any 'average' based rating system, such as IMDB reviews or User Metacritic reviews are 'Metabombed,' by fools sincerely offended by the current number which "represents" a given title. As internet veterans, our eyes are typically firmly fixed upon the reasoned content on offer in a given article or review. Gazing into the comments for too long serves only to engender revulsion at best, and a tediously long and pointlessly frustrating "exchange of ideas" with some lowly commenter at worst. That said, even the most resolute will inevitably have a nosy at the comments, so I figured why not ripoff Bitsocket's excellent "Metacrock of shit" feature from their podcast, and have a thread dedicated towards showcasing some stupid bile and making a guessing game out of what the user is talking about, or just generally showcasing some nonsense. Here are some examples, can you guess the game? - [spoiler="Grum84 vis Metacritic wrote:
- Grum84 vis Metacritic[/spoiler]"]Realy disapoiment , the game is full of bad game design disition. I don’t care of grafick but story line UI AND AI is just terible =( Realy they make the game for 10 old boys. (2/10)
- Anon wrote:
- [Game Title Title] eventually de-evolves into a crapfest of explosions, [character reference] animations popping up on screen every 10 seconds accompained with their specific loud sound effect and enemies exploding into coins and gore and weapons with so many "KEWL!" adjectives on the name that they don't even fit on the menu.
Anyone who would see something like that would think that it's like what a mom in the 90's or a panic mongerer political pundit thinks all games are like and not representative of the medium.... but no, it's an actual videogame that [Developer]put out under the name of what was once a brainy rpg series.
Enjoy your cultural vandalism."
And finally - Demonsoul via Metacritic wrote:
- [Developer's] writers inspire one human emotion…VOMIT, while that may not currently be in the dictionary as an emotion, after what [Developer] has done, I am certain in will be in all dictionaries soon as an emotion you feel after playing [Game]
If you want a shooter, play Halo, but the slightly improved combat can not make up for the overwhelming boredom this game permeates. Its so Effing BORING. BORING BORING BORING. BORING. BORING BORING BORINGBORING. BORING BORING [Many more repetitions of BORING]
OMG i think I’m going to give Witcher or WoW a try.
No wonder reviews were blocked until release.
[Developer] is pure evil. Instead of focusing on all those lawsuits and **** around people who did have creative rights to this game, and respecting them and having the sense to hire such valuable resources from guys who probably did deserve something, the used the law and technicalities to milk them for all they were worth, just like they are milking fans.
F U [Developer]. F U [Developer].F U [Developer].F U [Developer, repeated many more times]....F U [Developer]. (0/10) |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
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Age : 32
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 21:32 | |
| Nice idea! I'm struggling with the game though.... Bioshock Infinite? |
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Buskalilly
Galactic Nova
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Age : 34
Location : Nagano
| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:02 | |
| My initial guess would be Duke Nukem Forever, but from the context I assume it must be something otherwise quite well regarded. Destiny? |
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Muss
Shiny Shuckle
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Location : The 5th Dimension
| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:05 | |
| Not Destiny or Bioshock Infinite. It's a recent release and well regarded, and the top clue out of those "reviews" is probably '...what was once a brainy rpg series' |
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ZeroJones
I'M SO LONELY
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:06 | |
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Muss
Shiny Shuckle
Posts : 2557
Points : 2575
Join date : 2015-04-03
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:07 | |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
Posts : 4921
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Age : 32
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:10 | |
| I did think Fallout, but the adjectives and coin explosions put me off, gah. |
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ZeroJones
I'M SO LONELY
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:13 | |
| - Muss wrote:
- Fallout 4 it is!
Whoo-hoo!  Cheers, Scott Pilgrim - what do I win?  |
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Muss
Shiny Shuckle
Posts : 2557
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Join date : 2015-04-03
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Thu 21 Jan 2016 - 22:33 | |
| Bioshock Infinite is actually a really good guess though, it definitely fits. On the second one [Character Reference]... was actually 'Vaultboy' - Anon wrote:
- Fallout 4 eventually de-evolves into a crapfest of explosions, Vaultboy animations popping up on screen every 10 seconds accompained with their specific loud sound effect and enemies exploding into coins and gore and weapons with so many "KEWL!" adjectives on the name that they don't even fit on the menu.
I should probably have used a different term instead of character reference in hindsight. - ZeroJones wrote:
- Whoo-hoo! Cheers, Scott Pilgrim - what do I win?
I could offer you the rights to posting the next set of pissturd reviews, although it requires a bit more effort than other threads that follow that structure like the "whose that pokemon" thread. So perhaps a 1up would do?  |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
Posts : 4921
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Fri 22 Jan 2016 - 9:42 | |
| I think it'd be nice to pass the buck to the winner, I don't think searching a game and grabbing some funny comments is much more effort that drawing, uploading & posting a Pokemon either. I may end up eating those words though  |
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ZeroJones
I'M SO LONELY
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Fri 22 Jan 2016 - 9:52 | |
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Buskalilly
Galactic Nova
Posts : 15082
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Age : 34
Location : Nagano
| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Fri 22 Jan 2016 - 9:54 | |
| I'm happy to wait. The rules are there to facilitate the fun. |
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Muss
Shiny Shuckle
Posts : 2557
Points : 2575
Join date : 2015-04-03
Location : The 5th Dimension
| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Fri 22 Jan 2016 - 18:37 | |
| Alrighty, over to ZeroJones once he's over event hosting fatigue |
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JayMoyles
Galactic Nova
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Fri 22 Jan 2016 - 20:59 | |
| This is a quality thread idea, Muss. I was thinking Borderlands myself when reading your comments, but Fallout also makes sense.
*awaits Zero serving up some Metacritic bile* |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
Posts : 4921
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sat 23 Jan 2016 - 21:15 | |
| I did think Borderlands but I didn't think that would be RPGish enough, not to mention I don't think anyone could describe it as brainy. |
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JayMoyles
Galactic Nova
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sat 23 Jan 2016 - 22:44 | |
| Borderlands' memetastic humour in some of its sidequests probably killed a few of my brain cells. |
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ZeroJones
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:04 | |
| With apologies to the Musster of Ceremonies for the delay! - Three quotes, one game, you guess!:
- aasecr14 of Metacritic, 2/10 wrote:
- This game was marketed as a sequel to [previous game in the series]. What I expected was well polished sequel to the fantastic original. Not only did they alter the story so radically that it makes no sense in context to [that previous game in the series], but the gameplay was so easy and boring that it took me only 2 days to beat. I instantly felt cheated, and decided I should sell the game as soon as possible so I could go buy [a different popular game on the system]. Do not buy this game. As a huge fan of the series, I have beaten 15/17 of the games in the series, not counting [spin-off game 'in' the series], and this game was a huge letdown. Do not buy it. Borrow it from your buddy, beat it in a week, and then move on with your life.
- an excerpt from the thoughts of ayyyqurl of Metacritic, 4/10 wrote:
- The difficulty curb is pathetic. Any [game series] veteran worth their salt could breeze through the dungeons and abuse the [REDACTED] system. If you've beaten any [game series] game, this is on permanent baby mode. But hey, once you beat the game, why not try [newly unlocked difficulty level] where the enemies kill you in 1-2 hits? What do you mean finishing a dungeon is now impossible?
- an excerpt from the thoughts of icemanoe3 of Metacritic, 3/10 wrote:
- The entire game is pretty much the same thing over and over with nothing added. I was amazed by the fact that [the hero] was not able to obtain rings or really anything special.... Halfway through the game I ended up having [maxed out cash] and pretty much nothing to spend them on... In my opinion there should have been about 25 different [sets of armour] that all had different abilities. but the makers of this game decided to include really no added content... This game would be great for a 5 year old that can read at a 5th grade level.
Last edited by ZeroJones on Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:32; edited 1 time in total |
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Balladeer
DIVINE LONELINESS
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:18 | |
| I'm going to open fire at Skyward Sword. |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
Posts : 4921
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:19 | |
| I'm going to go with The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds. |
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ZeroJones
I'M SO LONELY
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:26 | |
| Crumplestiltskin takes it!  The site said there were 56 negative reviews for the game but I could only read about eight of them - do you have to sign up to get access to the full horror?  |
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Balladeer
DIVINE LONELINESS
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:26 | |
| Oh damn, of course it is.  Mention of "sequel" should have tipped me off. |
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Crumpy Andy
Zeta Metroid
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 8:35 | |
| - Here we go!:
- theTRUTHson of Metacritic, 2/10 wrote:
- I got this game after reading all the good reviews in here and in other sites. I was really looking forward to get into it. When the credits rolled after an hour and a half I could not believe it. I'm sorry, this isn't even a game. You just go forward, that's it. And as far as the atmosphere goes, which is what everyone is praising, I played it after beating Bloodborne, so yeah, the bar was set way too high. Boring, short, not fun. I can't believe I spent 15 euros on this rather than spending 10 on the Witcher 3 expansion. I feel like I've been robbed.
- thefishslap of Metacritic, 3/10, excerpt wrote:
- The game might of been better if it was finished. The graphics aren't very pretty, and the story dumber than flumber. My first time playing the game, I tried to beat the first. The PS3 wasn't a very good console choice eather because it doesnt have enought prosessing prower to handle this stupid, a better choice would of been the 3Wii S or the 3 dimensional portable. If i got to play the game i might have
- Turbodowg of Metacritic, 1/10, excerpt wrote:
- Although I have had fun on the PS4, I have recently realised that the console is one big ploy! You see, Sony has got us all to pay our hard earned cash to buy this shiny new console and when we buy it what games are offered to us? PS3 games. I cant remember how many times I've thought to my self 'dam I wish I'd not traded the PS3'. We have just had re-master after re-master of games we all paid for and played years ago. Yes a ploy! We have upgraded the console to a PS4 when we didn't need to in the first place! If we kept our PS3s we would have all of the current games for cheaper, already owned or free from ps+! Genius Sony!
And [this game] is now the latest insult to PS4 gamers who got this game free on PS+ two years ago. 19.99 is a joke to pay for 1.5 hours of gameplay. Some say it is art others say it is rubbish. Personally I sit somewhere in between. I couldn't be bothered to finish the game because I found it so dull. My mind switched off as I effortlessly pushed forward for 30 minutes looking at sand and bits of ruins and badly animated floaty things. I soon turned it off and never went back.
Now some of the fanboys will insult my intelligence at this point and tell me I'm a moron or have no class and need to go back to school and all that other nonsense. But I say to them, I get it. I understand to you it is art. But art is subjective, and it doesn't mean you are stupid or idiotic because you do not like the same art as someone else.
So I wont insult you guys and gals who are happy to pay 19.99 to play a 1.5 hour walking simulator, if that's what floats ya boat! But I refuse to be ripped off by Sony purchasing yet another re-master on the PS4. Hell they even released a streaming service so we can rent PS3 games! If I wanted to play PS3 games I would never have traded the bloody thing!!!
So its up to you if you want to play through this odd little game that has captivated so many, I sure wont be paying for it when they couldn't even get me to play it for free
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Jimbob
Bargain Hunter
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 9:57 | |
| Sand? That sounds like a hell of a... Journey |
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Balladeer
DIVINE LONELINESS
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 10:05 | |
| Which one's yours, Andy?  |
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masofdas
The Next Miyamoto
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| | Subject: Re: Wha'daya So Mad About? Sun 24 Jan 2016 - 10:33 | |
| I think you may be right Jim, but the last review there is having more of a go at the PS4 then the game and if it was Journey that's FREE if you already bought it on PS3.
I don't get the second review there what so ever though as if it is Journey none of that makes any sense. |
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