Snacks! Reviews/'reviews' welcome

That sounds vile, to be fair.

Domino's Meateor



Spent Friday evening meeting my girlfriend's bestie, watching the Olympics, befriending a dog, and ordering a Domino's.

Pros

• Tasted good
  
• Filled me up and left me with half a pizza to put in the fridge

Cons

• Gave me horrendous food poisoning. My belly hurts and I keep doing liquid shits.
  
• Put me off eating the half in my fridge

How ironic that I, the Master Cheese, should be slain by a Domino's Pizza. This is horrible, and my week off work has started with me feeling really ill! I powered through my shift on Saturday, despite spending more time on the loo than the shop floor.

10/10

Domino's pizzas can be dangerous. I remember a limited edition really spicy one they made a few years back, when I was still in my meat-eating days. I had a slice and thought "Oooh, this is a bit hot", so I had some water and soldiered on. Four slices later I was stood in front of the sink, filling and downing a glass of water, wondering if I'd ever be able to taste anything ever again.

I've had food poisoning off of a Meateor before. I did go drinking/clubbing after it but only had a couple of drinks (so there was the chance of a drink being spiked) but was found by a friend passed out in a pile of sick. Horrendous experience, yet one I am willing to risk again because it's a great pizza. Ate a lot of them during my uni days thanks to those 50% off vouchers, so you'd end up buying £40 quid of pizza for £20, and it would last 3 days.

I may have said before that I'm not a fan of Domino's. This does nothing to change that opinion.

p.s. Go on, I'll bite: why 'the Master Cheese'?

Isn't it a master chief helmet made of domino's boxes? Swear he's posted it on here.

Yeah, when Halo 5 came out Dominos ran a competition to finish it within the first 36 hours, I stayed up all night and marathoned it, won the competition and was crowned the Master Cheese. It's a play on Master Chief, see?

I won the helmet and 4 free pizzas. My favourite moment was the reply to the tweet announcing I won:

Liam ‏@liamions wrote:

@Dominos_UK you said finish the game to earn it, not have the chance to earn it wouldn't of bothered if I knew!

That is quite the trophy. Sounds like the wrong way to play a game to me, but fair enough if you had fun!

It wasn't how I wanted to play the game. I'd planned to ramp the difficulty up and take my time with it but, y'know, helmet and pizza...

Just realised - pizza is a snack to Drunka.  

Cubi Hazelnut Wafers

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If you've not eaten these, you've never lived. That's right - up to press, most of you have been zombies. Cube-shaped sweet snack with layers of wafer sandwiching hazelnutty chocolate. Yes.

Pros:

• Ruddy delicious
  
• Made in Italy so European and chic and that
  

Cons:

• Limited availability - have only seen in ASDA
  
• The bag has a bottom
  

Mmmm rating: 10/10

They remind me of something, though I'm not sure what. Look nice though.

I have eaten something very similar if not identical. They are indeed wonderful.

Walkers Stax (Paprika Flavour)

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So Jo and I saw these at the weekend and took a punt. They're suspiciously similar to a product that's been on the market for years... modesty prevents me from saying which one, but let's just say Superman's cousin Pring El is not happy.

Pros:

• Subtler flavour than the leading competitor
  
• Limited edition, so novelty factor
  

Cons:

• Limited availability - have only seen in ASDA
  
• A middling imitation of Those Other Crisps In A Cylindrical Container
  

Mmmm rating: 6/10

Zero wrote:

They're suspiciously similar to a product that's been on the market for years...modesty prevents me from saying which one, but let's just say Superman's cousin Pring El is not happy.

I bet Slazenger are fucking ragin' right now.

M&S used to do really nice sour cream-flavoured stacker things. After the initial shock, it made me realise how bland sour cream Pringles are in comparison. Can't find them these days, sadly: presume they wilted in the face of more popular competition.

I'm quite a big fan of the Nation's Favourite Convex Crisp so I'll probably give these a go; we've got them in at work.

Soba Cup Noodles



Caught my eyes in Tesco, and considering I've FINALLY got around to beating Spirit of Justice Case 4, I was tempted to try this.

Regret ensued as I stared at the scraggly mass of noodles in the cup below, stained a murky brown by a sachet of what was presumably soy sauce given ever so kindly with the product. Regret turned to disgust as I poked at the lump of some green vegetable that had made its way into this abomination. Disgust turned to a cloying aftertaste which I had to get rid of with something sweet.

All in all, this gets a rating of:

(mild AA6-4 spoilers, watch until the screen fades to black, and apologies for not finding an actual image of the moment I wanted!)

That's an amazing reaction Jay.

Is there any noodles of this variety that are actually any good?

Pigs in Blankets Pringles

Pigs in blankets are a perennial Christmas favourite, perhaps because of how many ways they're against the rules for Jews, and when I saw these in the shop, my appetite was whetted indeed!
I did suspect they might just be standard bacon pringles in a festive tube, but actually they're pretty bloody nice!

Pros

• Taste like the dish they're based on
  
• Likeable and addictive in that Pringle way.
  
• I have small hands so Pringles tubes don't bother me that much

Cons

• the pig, for though it divides the hoof, thus making a split hoof, it does not chew cud, it is unclean to you. 8 You shall not eat of their flesh nor touch their carcasses; they are unclean to you.
  
• You shall not boil a kid in its mother’s milk.

Satan/10

Forget the Pringles, I want actual pigs in blankets now.  

I've got a Christmas meal with work coming up. I was horribly torn between roast beef and roast turkey because I couldn't choose between pigs in blankets and yorkshire puddings.

While that's tough, I'd go for the pigs in blankets. Take advantage of the festive season while it's on. Plenty of room for Yorkshire puddings all through the rest of the year.

My thinking in the end was the opposite: I'm gonna end up having so many bloody turkey meals in December, I think I can afford to give this one a miss.

Are there many turkey fans on here? I always felt it was a dry, inferior meat.