Things That Really !&$%2 You Off

Shoes are for cowards with soft feet.

You know what?  I'm going to say something I should've said over six years ago.  I've no doubt this will get me lynched because I dared to express my unfiltered thoughts about a member of the core clique, but you know what?  I literally do not give a single fuck any more.  I'm done playing nice and letting insult after insult go by (funniest bit is Drunka won't even see it, so he won't even be able to contest my points.  This is why only fools use ignore features on forums.  Grow thicker skin or learn to skim read like Balla has.)

Oh, did the tone of that paragraph sound a little different?  Welcome to me when I'm genuinely angry and give not a single shit what others think!  If I'd stuck up for myself years ago maybe this wouldn't have gotten to this point, guess I'll just add "stand up for yourself regardless of the persecution from others you might incur" to the list of life-lessons.  

Oh, but before I start, let me just say one thing.  Only idiots think killing the past is wise.  It's especially foolish to use it as a mantra when the person saying it is a cartoonish villain who spends the rest of the film losing his head.  

I could go on, but you know what?  I think we should in fact take that lesson to heart and start with the past that includes The Last Jedi.

Drunkalilly wrote:

And guess who's muted again

Yeah, you go ahead and do that.  We all know the height of bravery is deliberately baiting a response from someone and then removing their platform because you can't stand to have someone retort.  I imagine if we were to go to the dictionary right now and look up the terms coward and hypocrite and asshole you would be present at all three.  "I don't like someone ranting about something in the rant topic, I don't even have the capacity to skim a post when a person is saying things I disagree with!  How dare they express their frustration in the appropriate place!"

Lets get something clear here.  I have walked on eggshells around you (never should have) for years.  "Oh, he's more willing to look in to things I've said were decent than anyone else on the forum, maybe there's room for reason and discourse.  Maybe he actually isn't a mean douche".  Oh what a laughable delusion that was.    

That came after your absolute meltdown in the prerelease of Fire Emblem Fates during the censorship scandal, where you went absolutely ballistic over something that didn't even turn out to be accurate.  But that didn't stop you going off your head and hurling abuse at every person that didn't immediately agree with your view, did it?  

Then the dust settles, and I think "maybe just a once off.  Maybe he was just drunk, or having a shit week.  It happens, I'll just make sure to not press his buttons and blablabla".  So, rather than ever even mention how pissed off (that's Australian for absolutely furious, not the English term for being blind drunk) I was, I let it slide.  

Then the passive-aggressive sniping begins.  Remember you were the one who, when I simply said "The Last Jedi sucks when you actually take it apart and look at it analytically, and so my view has reversed", chose to snarkly snipe.  On other forums I visit such behaviour is an indicator that proof and justification is needed to explain oneself.  In your case you just wanted to be an arsehole, and were never remotely interested in a discourse.  

But, again, I chose to let the personal attacks (which is what your posts actually are, no matter how well you think you veil them) slide for the sake of peace.  Even while you continue to snidely direct antagonistic shots my way in forms I cannot reply to.  

Then, when I place my "rant" in a place I assumed was, you know, for fucking rants, you go "welp, this guy's too opinionated!  Better mute him to  preserve my precious little egotistical echo chamber!"  

You know, even if every single instance of your sniping or hiding personal ridicule under the guise of snark is just you coming off a bad day, so fucking what?  You think you're the only person who has shit days?  Between my depression and mood swings every day is a shit day for me (and guess why none of you lot knew that about me.  Trust issues perhaps.  Perhaps never truly being welcome).  And guess what?  I don't consider that an excuse to be a piece of reeking excrement to other people (I do, however, use less harmful ways to let off my steam.  Three guesses to Sherlock Holmes what my harsh criticism of pieces of fiction are!)  

I've been to some seriously nasty places over the years, and dealt with some seriously fucked up individuals.  You have actually made me miss interacting with them.  Because while dealing with said individuals did put me in a suicidal mindspace I can, at least, say that at the other end of that hellish tunnel I came out mentally stronger for it.  

But by all means "mute" me for a time.  It spares me having to deal with your cowardly, petty, spiteful passive-aggressive bullshit, and means that you cannot reply to me if I choose to tear your post to ribbons.  Assuming the clique continues to tolerate my presence after this, which I doubt.  

Now for a cup of piping hot chocolate and the final part of this.  By god it feels good to get this crap off my back.  

Balladeer wrote:

Hollywood needs to learn some diversity and if it has to stumble along the way to do so then that's a temporary price worth paying (I don't think TLJ is a stumble and we'll never convince each other on that point).

That's probably not going to happen.  As people start turning off for a variety of factors (franchise fatigue, boredom of social politics being shoved into their pretty light festivals, and so on) big business will chase the money.  The pendulum has gone one way, and it will simply swing to the other rather than stopping at the sensible center.  

And besides, why should the cost be a graveyard of the best franchises in modern culture?  Why cannot these mega-corporations simply hire the talent necessary to leapfrog these mistakes and get straight on with making good stories?  Same reason they're miling franchises that are finished to begin with: easy money.  They won't "get good" they'll simply "get gone", and fans will be left with the desecrated corpses of their once-loved franchises.  

And why does the story-telling have to take a hit?  Just cast the right people for the right roles and normalise diversity through the most effective way.  People didn't need to be "taught" to accept Sara Conner and Ripley and Leia.  They were good characters in good movies that kicked ass and the rest did itself.  Action heroines and action heroes that aren't white have long since been normalised, this isn't a bridge that needs to be crossed except in Hollywood themselves, because they're the ones still casting like it's the 80's, and when they cast like the 00's they make the story revolve around social politics in the most asinine and contradictory of ways.  

As for TLJ, I'll just say this.  When darn near every scene in a film is filled to the brim with illogical choices by characters, plot contrivances and devices never heard of before (some of which graduate to the status of plot holes), and inane subplots that add literally nothing to the story then it is badly written.  

That doesn't mean it's wrong to enjoy it (lord knows I love my fair share of trainwrecks.  Code Geass, Death Note's last arc, Gundam Seed, I can go on and on), but it also doesn't mean we should ignore its objective quality.  

Quote :

 There are still good films.

Not from the Mouse.

Also fun fact for the people that made it to the end, I came here today to simply say I bought Terminator 2 on bluray and Black Adder on dvd, while also praise Square Enix's e3 conference. That'll show me for being in a good mood!

Argh, I don't like this. I'm sure it's nothing against you Athrun: Drunka's that brusque with everyone, including (especially) his BFFs, and repeating negative stuff is a bugbear of his no matter who it comes from. Nothing personal, nothing angry meant.

Drunkalilly wrote:

Shoes are for cowards with soft feet.

I am unfortunately a coward. That said, after my feet blistered up something horrendous, I actually took off my shoes for the last bit of my walk home.

It felt much better.

Athrun888 wrote:

but it also doesn't mean we should ignore its objective quality.

I'm not commenting on TLJ chat as I've said my piece on that elsewhere and it's been done to death by this point - I don't think we'll change anybody's minds with our arguments about it any longer - but I did want to touch on this part.

I don't like when people use the word "objective" because it's often used incorrectly. More often than not, when people use the word "objective" they're still considering whatever they're critiquing from a place of emotion and personal opinion. More often than not, it's used to try and state that a certain film or game or whatever is bad no matter the argument, but equally somebody could come along and state the opposite and then we're back into a subjective argument. People like what they like - I'm not here to convince anybody of the contrary, but I do take umbrage when people try to state that something is "objectively bad" because it's likely that the argument delivered comes from a place of emotion and then we're clearly moving away from objectivity.

If that made zero sense, it's because it's coming up on 1am and I clearly need my bed.

Anyhow, as for something that recently wound me up - music being played out loud from somebody's phone on a bus. I experienced that coming back from Glasgow on Sunday... it was shite music too.

Uuuuuuurgh. I'm going to go so far as to say that nothing should ever be played on a 'phone speaker in public. Whatever you play will sound immeasurably worse, to you not to mention to everyone around you.

Balladeer wrote:

Argh, I don't like this. I'm sure it's nothing against you Athrun: Drunka's that brusque with everyone, including (especially) his BFFs, and repeating negative stuff is a bugbear of his no matter who it comes from.  Nothing personal, nothing angry meant.

*Shrug*  I can be cynical at the best of times, and if it wasn't clear before I can also be a grizzly bear when genuinely angered.  

If it's any consolation to everybody you won't have to worry about my participating in discussions of Rise of Skywalker, as I have no interest in so much as watching it.  There's no stakes that make me wonder how the heroes will pull a win off, the main cast are all various shades of boring (or an incoherent mess in the case of Kylo Ren), and the story itself is a pointless retread of the original trilogy.  

JayMoyles wrote:

Athrun888 wrote:

but it also doesn't mean we should ignore its objective quality.

I'm not commenting on TLJ chat as I've said my piece on that elsewhere and it's been done to death by this point - I don't think we'll change anybody's minds with our arguments about it any longer - but I did want to touch on this part.

I don't like when people use the word "objective" because it's often used incorrectly. More often than not, when people use the word "objective" they're still considering whatever they're critiquing from a place of emotion and personal opinion. More often than not, it's used to try and state that a certain film or game or whatever is bad no matter the argument, but equally somebody could come along and state the opposite and then we're back into a subjective argument. People like what they like - I'm not here to convince anybody of the contrary, but I do take umbrage when people try to state that something is "objectively bad" because it's likely that the argument delivered comes from a place of emotion and then we're clearly moving away from objectivity.

If that made zero sense, it's because it's coming up on 1am and I clearly need my bed.  

Anyhow, as for something that recently wound me up - music being played out loud from somebody's phone on a bus. I experienced that coming back from Glasgow on Sunday... it was shite music too.  

Ooh yes, can't stand it when people on public transport put their media on blast.  Get some noise-cancelling tins or simply leave media that requires audio for private use.  

To clarify about earlier, I did not bring up TLJ again because I wanted to criticise it specifically.  I brought it up because it had an example I needed to make to provide context for a statement others were questioning, and it was the example most likely to be understandable by people.  Would anybody here have understood what I was talking about or the metrics I was using if I brought up "Fantasy Novel 2i23: The Dark Lord Vacation"?  

As for objectivity, I'll keep it brief (or my version of brief anyway).  When it comes to TLJ it's worth noting that my praise for the film was what came purely on emotion.  My dislike of it has come from my critical lookbacks after the emotion faded (you'll find this happens with most media I consume.  Look at every game I replay, my views always temper as the afterglow has long worn off).  

To put it simply my dislike is created because of its flaws.  The plot made no logical sense and was convoluted to the point of contrivance, the movie would have ended repeatedly without characters choosing the stupidest options available to them (and even then they needed new tech created solely for the plot to function...), and the character arcs led to nowhere.  

These were realisations that arose due to a variety of factors including a rewatch, engaging in discussions with people that both agreed and disagreed with me (back then I was the one doing the defending), and some good old quiet contemplation.  It was after all of that the emotions arose, and because of my emotional attachment to the franchise my criticisms were more... Prolonged than they would be for other media.  

I also do not agree that liking or disliking something mitigates the idea of objectivity.  I can quite easily tear things I love to pieces when analysing them (Fire Emblem Fates, persona 3, Tales of the Abyss, Death Note, Code Geass, ect ect ect.  All of these have severe objective flaws, and I can quite easily acknowledge and discuss those flaws while still loving them), and I can also see the quality in things that are of good craftmanship even when I either don't like them (Metroid Prime, you will struggle to find a game I've played for over 20 hours that I have as much emotional apathy for, yet I also consider it of the highest pedigree despite my apathy) or outright dislike them.  

Liking or disliking something should not inhibit someones capacity to make observations about them.  

With all of that said if something has elicited an emotional response then it only makes sense to be able to figure out why it did as well.  I'm sure plenty of people have had instances where they found a story's attempt to manipulate their emotions was so transparent that they either laughed or rolled their eyes (nobody is going to take something that introduces a villain with them kicking a dog in the face seriously after all.  Well, not unless the thing in question is deliberately playing things up *cough*DioBrando*cough*).

So much for short.  The subject of objectivity and subjectivity can be a lengthy one.

I hate being a grown-up in a professional sense. As our company is expanding, and really trying to crack the kitchen design market as we have the bathroom design market, the decision was made to invest in expanding the kitchen design team. That meant that I was promoted to a "team leader" last year, and would essentially be overseeing all of the new people hired specifically for this new team. I don't mind from a technical/mentoring point of view (I've been at the company a while, and do probably have the best knowledge of kitchens), but I've also had to start worrying about administration and man-management.

Worse still, the sudden expansion and shuffling around means that this team has moved into an extra, smaller room; therefore, within the room, I'm the most senior person, and therefore have to be the one to react to any sudden HR-related stuff. I've had no previous management experience. Luckily the first couple of people we hired were basically model employees, but the most recent guy has been much more challenging. I think he might be on the spectrum somewhere - I find he gets distracted when I'm trying to explain things to him, and I don't get the impression he's listening; and, since he joined a couple of months ago, I think there's only been a couple of weeks where he's been in every day, either being sick, or having to deal with a situation and asking if he can work from home. Now he has had a lot of bad luck - and I worry that the time I got concerned was when the most serious thing happened, so I feel guilty as a result - but he does always seem to look for an excuse to not be here.

I am talking to my immediate manager about this, and he is trying to help, but I don't want that sort of responsibility; I'm automatically anti-authoritarian myself, and do get anxious about upsetting people in an advantageous way. I hate being in a situation where I've got to start reprimanding people; I always hoped that, if I was in a position of power, I'd make sure I'd stick up for the people below me - I at least feel like that for the other guys I guess. If it weren't for some big changes occurring that I'd like to spearhead, and the fact that I do actually care about the company/software/teammates, I'd be considering my options I think.

Sorry, that's a lot of words. It's not even about the Star Wars things.

Ooft, I feel ya man. I've been a team leader, and am now a teacher, and it's hard to reconcile that with an anti-authority attitude and/ or general human decency. Hope you can find a way to do it while still being true to yourself!

I feel ya too, for different reasons. I've spent my entire life feeling like, and being, a bit of a pushover. I don't think I'd be very good at disciplining unruly employees. I've led a few projects, but never had to really test my mettle, and the thought terrifies me.

Big changes sound fun and interesting though! Hope you get to do lots of work on them.

Yeah, it's tough and what at the moment has really gotten me down along with a few other things outside work. My Dr has given me some off though after needing someone to talk to about it all.

Some time off is that? Hope it works for you Mas. Why does your doctor say that you need to read?

This weather, music with a heavy bassline outside a club, and the practice of buying bouquets all enter into it for me this evening. I bought The Lady some flowers and, while they smelled really nice at the start, they're now just going crispy. They bring such a small amount of pleasure and then just seem like a metaphor for love drying up over time. I don't get it.

Yeah I should have put time off

Yes that from twitter. Dr said that avoiding screens and all the stuff that comes with it (some like this are of course good), might be helpful, especially like a hour before bed.

She then suggested like listen to some music or read a book, things along those lines in that hour.

She's right, I do believe: 'blue light' from screens and them alerts your brain and stops it from wanting to sleep. It's a good call. Also hopefully the books you read will soothe your thoughts away from what's been going on during the day, if that happens to you and keeps you awake like it does me.

I'm very aware that I have no room to talk though.

Yeah I’m really bad at sleep, so I try and at least have 30 mins to read before bed, though I’ve recently got back into reading marvel comics on my tablet as I don’t have a bedside table/lamp yet. At least I’ve trained my brain to accept that reading is sleeping time and that helps a lot.

Of course if the heat back home is as bad as I’m hearing, ain’t nothing gonna send me off...

Sent from Topic'it App

It's improved. It's not great, and it's still awfully sticky, but it's improved. (Of course, even with climate change there's not a great deal to go in the UK above 38ºC...)

I really ought to read more prior to bed. I've been in a nasty habit of sticking something on YouTube and crashing out whilst my tablet is still playing a video.

Ooft, yes, that doesn't sound good. I only read before bed these days, for the most part, which means that I read very sloooooowlyyyyyy.

I read on lunch breaks mostly, but then when my book gets exciting and start reading late into the night.

I also have this problem. 'Time for bed, I'll just read for ten minutes first... how is it 2am already?'

I'm getting to old man territory in that I envy your abilities to read into the night! Now if I read, or even watch YouTube, I've started dropping off as soon as it gets past 11. Now waking up in the middle of the night and not getting back to sleep - that's my speciality!

I've grown better at that one. That assumes of course that my earplugs can keep out London's Finest Baselines, which is not always the case.

Life.  

Specifically Wayne.  The last week his behaviour has taken a big shift downwards, and if I can't figure out what to do with him I'm going to have to adopt him out.  

He's always been an odd cat even by cat standards.  Never leaves me alone, always whines for attention when I so much as stand up from my chair, and lately he's taken to attacking me when I change his litter in his room.  He's always been territorial over his room, but lately he's started lashing out and attacking me from behind for changing his litter.  

Even when I think all's clear I'll just be calmly walking and then BAM.  Jumps on the back leg and tries to sink his claws in.  

I've tried everything I can think of.  I've tried giving him treats before and after I go in to change the litter, I've tried being kind anf affectionate to reassure him, I've tried ignoring him.  No success, and now he's getting distinctly worse.  And now of course I simply don't trust him anymore either, all of these attacks have been unprovoked on my end.  I've done nothing but shower him with love and kindness since I adopted him, and by this age I really thought he'd have adapted to life with me.  Instead it's starting to look like he simply doesn't suit the lifestyle and being an indoor cat.  

Like, it's gotten to the point where while I think he's still extremely affectionate unless he's triggered he's put me so on edge that simply him rubbing up against me has me involuntarily stiffening. He's due for his annual vaccinations next week so I'll book a consultation with the vet to see if anything can be done, but I'm genuinely at the end of my patience. It's not healthy for either of us at this point.

I hate it.  I hate that I've failed him somehow, and I fucking hate the fact that if this continues I'll have no choice but to find another home for him that better suits his needs.  I just fucking hate all of it and life right now.

That's rubbish sir, sorry to hear. Wayne's a little cutie, but if he's not working for you then he's not working for you, and vice versa. There's nature and nurture, and I don't know what the mix is here but cats are hunters and you've always said Wayne's more hunty than most!

(Side note: the drawing of you and Wayne I did has just taken on a whole new violent light...)

Sorry to hear that, Athrun. Hopefully the vet can shed some light as to why Wayne is acting up as such - you shouldn't blame yourself though as it sounds like you've been nothing but affectionate and caring for your pet.